Duncan - First time with Malique (Patreon)

After turning 25, I went through a bit of a quarter-life crisis. I realized I had gained some weight during the COVID-19 pandemic. Taking college classes from home and eating potato chips as a meal took away my athletic build and replaced it with something I hated. My crisis hit me like a ton of bricks, and by the end of 2023, I decided to eat healthier and start hitting the gym.

I lost about 20 lbs of fat and replaced it with muscle between October of 2023 and March 2024 by chucking out the junk food and jogging every morning, doing low-weight high-reps at the gym 3 to 5 times a week (but more often 3 if I’m being honest). I'm back to my old weight of 145lbs. I'm average height, at 5’10 and while I refused to admit it, I’ve always found guys who look like me attractive. Not just in a, “yeah, he’s a good-looking guy,” kind of way, but I’ve had drunken make-outs, the occasional blow job with them kind of way.

I wouldn’t say I’m in denial about my sexuality, as much as I know I can have sex with women, so I date and have sex with women instead of admitting to myself that I’m into guys. I try not to lead them on, but I keep up appearances with my friends and let them all think I’m “picky.” If I date a woman for a month, I can go another 3 without. If I date a woman for 3 months I don’t need to date again for the rest of the year.

I know it’s 2024, sexuality is a spectrum, blah, blah, blah. I’m just not interested. I had a friend in high school that I traded blow jobs with, but it never progressed from there, and when he ended up coming out in our freshmen year of college it put a lot of pressure on me to either come out too or hide so deep in the closet even I would forget my attraction to other men. I chose the latter.

It was easy at first, dating and fucking girls, staying away from gay or bi porn. Occasionally when drunk I’d think about those blow jobs back in high school, or have an occasional make-out with another guy while really drunk. But then I slipped up several years ago now, having a wild night with a guy where he let me top him. It was great, but the guilt the next day had me twisting in my head all the lies I needed to reinforce the biggest lie I tell myself and others, that I’m straight, until now.

I have been out of my last relationship with a woman for about six months and the need for intimacy and sexual release has kicked into high gear. It could be because I have lost weight and am physically healthier, finding myself sexy. It could be from going to the gym and seeing attractive guys in the locker room, smelling the musk of men can be intoxicating. It could be because I’m closing in on 26 and have never had a real relationship. It’s most likely because I crave being manhandled by someone and have been fantasizing about a guy going balls-deep in me for too long.

About two months ago, I matched up with a guy on the apps who kept insisting I let him come over to fuck me raw when we would chat, but, while I found the idea super hot, I declined. He hit me up a week later, offering to fuck me with a condom but he also warned me he was likely to go limp with a condom on. I can't blame him. I can't remember the last time I fucked a woman with a condom, and I know I stopped using them because I would go soft without the raw and constant stimulation of condomless sex.

As I kept seriously considering giving one of these guys an honest shot at my ass, I started looking into PrEP as a “just in case.” I even mustered up the courage to talk to my doctor about it and he agreed that while condoms are still the best choice, it’s best if I went on PrEP as an added layer of protection. He hammered home that PrEP doesn’t protect me the way condoms do and I found myself promising I would still use condoms if I had sex with a man, but that I wasn’t sure if I ever would.

About a month later I was on my way home from a jog, sweating like a beast, I noticed a guy running towards me, one of my neighbors I had seen on Grindr. He’s a tall black guy about 6'4" with short hair, and a muscular build, he was also out for a jog, with his German Sheaphard running alongside him. If I recall his profile correctly he was mid 30's and a “total top.” I stopped at the crosswalk waiting for the light to turn and started stretching my legs, trying not to be obvious I was checking him out. His Underarmer tank top did nothing to hide his jacked torso. While I’ve mostly only been attracted to guys who look like me, and this guy was the opposite of me, I was feeling an undeniable attraction to him. Something I didn’t really know what to do with. I glanced at his gray sweats and saw the massive bulge bouncing back and forth as he jogged in place waiting for the light to turn in his favor.

As soon as the light flicked to “walk” I started jogging in his direction and him in mine. Shaking off the urges I was having to grope his swinging meat in his pants as he jogged by me. Putting the image into the back of my memory for later.

When I got home, I took a shower and jerked off. It had become a regular routine for me. I had learned just the right way to use the hand sprayer to tickle my balls and ass hole just right so that even with the terrible water pressure I had it would help me get off even while standing up. Without that something extra I can never blow my load standing…I don’t know why.

A few days later, I was alone in my apartment. I had gone out with my coworkers to celebrate a birthday. A few drinks later I was done and home by 11 pm. I showered and was in bed by midnight. Kinda tipsy and very horny, pulled out my vape pen and hopped on Grindr to hopefully flirt with a sexy guy and jerk off.

Scrolling through messages I hadn’t yet read, I noticed a message from the sexy jogger. I don’t have a pic in my profile, just my stats, so there was no way he deduced this was me from jogging if he even noticed me.

Jogger: "Hey."

Me: "Hey."

With no green dot next to his name to indicate he was online, I clicked over and started looking for some porn to watch. At first, I looked for straight porn, but the alcohol running through my system made it easier for me to skip that step and start looking for gay porn. One of which was a large, very sexy, black guy destroying a thin smaller white guy that looked like he was high on something.

After that three-minute video was over, I had my dick in hand, hard as a rock, I clicked back open Grindr.

Jogger: "Do you get down with black dick?"

Me: "Can’t say that I have, but I’ve also not had any dick lol."

Jogger: “You looking?”

Me: “Kind of.”

Jogger: “Pics?”

I hesitated, but with my inhibitions low and my horniness up, I sent him my photos.

Jogger: “Sexy, do you want to get your cherry popped by this?”

He attached a picture of the biggest dick I have ever seen. He was rock hard and had to be at least 9” cut.

Me: “Holy shit, that’s too big.”

I gave it about 30 seconds with no response before clicking back over to my porn search. A few videos later I opened the app again, the stupid advertisements annoying the shit out of my sexually frustrated ass, I almost hurled my phone across the room. No response from the jogger, but I had a few new messages I responded to and then when back over to my porn for a few videos, slowly stroking my 6” cut cock right to the edge, but when the video didn’t end in orgasm…neither did I.

Opening Grindr again, and again with the pop-up ads, I closed it and opened it again to see almost an hour had gone by and my jogger friend messaged me again.

Jogger: "Let me see that booty”

I quickly did a couple of squats, then sent him a pic of my ass in my boxer briefs.

Jogger: “Not bad, you looking to get fucked or no?”.

I read and reread that message a dozen times. Then I typed out and deleted a response a few dozen times, settling on, "I'm not sure." I don’t know what I was expecting in return, but I waited, then waited, then waited some more until he finally messaged back.

Jogger: "It's ok. You gotta want it."

I was scared I was about to get blocked and wanted to keep him on the hook, "I do want it," I hit send, unsure if I had just committed myself to something I wasn’t ready to follow through on.

A few excruciatingly long minutes went by before he responded: "Prove it."

I didn’t know what he meant, my dick was already precumming in my hand, throbbing from the excitement so I snapped a pic and sent it to him.

He wasn't interested in my dick, quickly messaging me, “Show me your hole.”

So I turned over on my bed and snapped a few pics of my hole. On camera, it was not as attractive as I hoped it would be. I got up and turned on the light, finding the right angle where you could see my hole, and at the same time, it made my ass look bigger than it really is. It wasn’t the worst pic of a guy's hole, so I sent it over to him. I don’t know why I was feeling nervous I would be rejected by a pic of my hole, but I was.

Jogger: “Come over.”

He attached his location, though I already had a good idea of where he lived from seeing him jogging in the neighborhood.

I felt my heart start racing. Was I seriously contemplating going down the street to get fucked by this massive man? I grabbed my vape pen and started hitting it hard. At the very least trying to bring my heart rate down from hypertension levels. I tried to think what to message back when he sent another.

Jogger: “I guess you’re not interested.”

I quickly typed out, “I am. I’m just really nervous.”

Jogger: “Don’t be, it’s supposed to be fun, I’ll make you feel good.”

I hit my vape again, then tried my best to type out, “I’m an anal virgin” without it sounding like I’m a fifteen-year-old girl. “I haven’t done it before,” I hit send. Then quickly added, “bottoming, that is.” Ugh, he’s going to block me for sure.

A few minutes later he messaged, “I know what I’m doing. Yours is not the first tight hole I’ve had to break in.”

I know this was supposed to be reassuring, but the words, “break in” made my hole seal shut. I hit my vape again, the THC doing its job had me pacing the room with less nervous tension. “You’ll be gentle?” I hit send and my heart rate fought out the vape and I could feel my entire body start to shiver with nerves.

Jogger: “Of course.”

That was all I needed. I slowly got dressed in a pair of jogging pants that hung off my waist now that I lost that spare tire, and a loose-fitting sleeveless shirt, then I was out the door.

I kept hitting my vape pen the entire walk over, trying to calm my nerves. My hands are shaking as I knock on his door. He opened it wearing some loose-fitting boxers, that same bulge a little thicker than when he was out running. Being this close to him I could feel the heat radiating off his mostly nude body, reinforcing how much bigger he was than me, and I started to get more nervous that I was making a huge mistake. This man can split me in half, or worse murder me, and no one would ever think to look for me here because everyone thinks I’m straight.

He gestured for me to walk in and locked the door behind me. I nervously stuck out my hand, “I’m Duncan,” I said. He shook my hand, flashing me a sweet smile, Malique, his hand dwarfed mine then he put his hand on my shoulder, pushing me to the couch. He put pressure on my shoulder and I sat instinctively. His boxers were just above my eye level as he pulled them down, his cock fell out and started to rise to attention. My eyes must have been incredibly wide. It was huge. Lengthwise it was every inch what he claimed it was, but it was the girth that scared me. The photo he sent didn’t do it justice. He pulled my head towards it. I told myself there was no backing out now, this is what I wanted and I began to lick it like the guys in the porn I was watching a few minutes ago. I was certain it wouldn't fit in my mouth and terrified he would try to fit it into my tight little ass hole.

Thankfully I overdid it with my vape pen on the way over, making it easier to relax my jaw around his thickness, but I managed to get about half of him in my mouth after a few minutes. It was work, but I was loving it. I couldn't get him in my throat at all, but I did all that I could do to give him the best blow job I had ever given. Thankfully the bar was low for that. I looked up at him as I sucked.

He smiled down at me and whispered, "Too big?"

I nodded but kept on sucking. I was on a mission. Something about the combination of weed, alcohol, the years of pent-up sexual frustration, his scent, his flavor, all of it had me pushing myself to put in more effort than ever before. He wasn’t pushing me, he just let me enjoy this long overdue moment while I tasted him and gave this blow job for me more than for him.

When I finally couldn’t suck it any longer, I let it fall out of my mouth and I stroked him, really feeling its weight and girth as I watched it throb in my fist. He motioned for me to stand up and turn around. Even though this is what I came here for, and he had been nothing but patient so far, I was feeling nervous again.

He pulled me up, pulling my shirt off, exposing my newly toned body in front of his well-defined torso, I felt underdeveloped, but the look of desire in his eyes made me more relaxed. He pulled my joggers and boxer briefs off together, and I stepped out of them as he manhandled my body, putting me on the couch, with my head by the arm, face down, then pulling my ass up as he sat between my legs taking no time before he dove tongue first at m hole.

“Mmm, yeah,” I groaned instantly. I hadn’t been rimmed before, and if I’m honest, when sober, the idea grosses me out, but here at this moment, with his massive hands on my ass, stretching my cheeks apart, his warm wet tongue massaging my outer ring, I had to grip the armrest just to give myself an outlet from the pleasure, pawing at it like a cat needing to scratch its claws into something. He quickly progressed from rimming me to full-on eating my hole. I didn’t expect to be able to relax my ass hole so easily, but his tongue was unlocking it like he knew the cheat code. I just moaned into the cushion and tried to stay still, not wanting him to pull his tongue out. Thankfully he just kept pushing it deeper, tongue fucking me with what had to be the longest tongue in the world.

He eventually wiped his mouth off and maneuvered me up to put my elbows on the back of the couch, my knees on the seat, bending over so my ass lined up perfectly with his cock when he stood up.

He reached for one of the magnum condoms he set out on the coffee table and started to tear it open and wrestle it over his massive tool. Taking his time to lube it up, and giving me more time to think of excuses to run out of there.

He put his hand on my shoulder and the other pushed my ass a little lower. He squirted some lube on his hand and rubbed it around my hole. I looked back and he had his condom-covered dick in his hand and squirt a large amount of extra lube on it, spreading all over his dick. He circled my hole gently with the tip, then used his thumb to massage my hole a bit, pushing his thumb in enough to open me up like when his tongue was digging deep a minute ago.

He replaced his cock on the ring, rubbed the head on my hole for a few seconds then slowly pushed it in. The pressure was intense. It felt like I was getting stretched to the limit and the lube didn't help at all. He felt me trying to pull away so he held my hips tight with both hands.

I groaned loud, “Ahh, fuck man…” I clenched my teeth, wanting to scream.

 He holds me tight and whispers, "Relax, you can take it, just breathe and relax."

There was something about his girth and the hardness, this didn’t feel at all like I hoped it would, the pain was unbearable. He pushed about halfway in and I jerked my ass away cause I couldn't take the pain anymore.

I gasped and was breathing heavily, “fuck, that’s too much,” I quickly turned and down on the couch, keeping him from sticking it again.

He looked down at me stroking his cock, "Too big?" he whispered with a maniacal grin.

"Uh…yeah..." I huffed, feeling bad about blue-balling him but my ass was still pulsing and shooting pain up into my stomach like I was kicked in the balls.

His smile faded as he stroked himself for a minute, “Want to try it again, I’ll go slower.”

“I don’t think I can, it’s way too big,” I confessed.

He nodded, understanding but looked disappointed as he slowly removed the condom and dropped it on the coffee table. He stood there stroking himself for a minute before I leaned in to try to unburden my guilt of blue-balling him by sucking him off. I started sucking on it for all I was worth. Bobbing up and down, trying to force it into my throat, not caring if I could breathe, I just wanted to get him to cum so I could leave guilt-free. We did this for a few minutes until he broke the silence.

"Do you want this dick?" He whispered in his deep gravelly voice.

I took his dick out of my mouth and said "Yeah," then went back to sucking it again.

"Bend back over, you can take it, you just need to power through that initial sting," he suggested.

Having felt the sting inside of me go away, feeling turned on from his flavor of precum in my mouth, and his musky scent, I wanted to give it another try. I took a deep breath then stood up and bent over the couch again. He reached down for another condom and wrestled it on his saliva-covered dick. He leaned down and started eating my hole again, the pleasure was making me bite my lower lip so I didn’t moan like a little bitch. I gripped the back of the couch with my fingers, leaving a permanent imprint in the pleather.

After a few minutes of his tongue opening me up I felt the tip of his dick press against my hole in it’s place. He put his right hand on my hip and put his left hand on my shoulder, probably to keep me from pulling away. I felt him slowly enter, and I mean slowly, giving me a chance to breathe with every millimeter and adjust to his girth as he gradually pushed most of it into my hole. The weed and booze in my system were certainly helping me relax, but it still stung and pulled at my anal walls as he stretched me to my limits.

I was breathing deep like he told me to, and trying my best to relax. I did want this, and I wanted him to be the guy to give it to me.

He leaned over my smaller frame, putting his hands over mine on the back of the couch as he slowly worked the last few inches inside with a subtle moan of pleasure.

I hissed and my breath caught as I clenched my teeth, “Ahh..ungh…fuck,” I felt him bottom out and his big hands squeezed my hands as his hips arched up and he managed to get even deeper into my hole.

 He kissed my neck and then whispered in my ear, "Does it hurt?"

I nodded and grunted. He was all the way in now, the only movement was the blood pumping through his massive cock, but even that was enough movement to make me groan with discomfort.

He pulled a couple of inches out then shoved it back in. “Ahhh, fu–uck,” I let out a groan of pain and my body instinctively tried to pull away, but his massive arm quickly came down and around my waist to hold me in place as he let out a low moan in pleasure. With how he was holding me there was no escaping.

He kissed the back of my neck then whispered, "Are you clean?" as he gave another thrust.

Feeling him thrust deeper into me I grunted out a, “Ungh…yeah."

"Mmm…good," he moaned and pulled out halfway then gave me a hard thrust, holding me tight.

I was gripping the couch so tight my hands were hurting, my eyes started to water, and then I felt him pull all the way out, leaving me empty as the air hit my well-lubed and now open hole. He still had a large hand on my shoulder, holding me in place and I heard a snapping sound that caught my attention and I turned my head hard to see him throw the condom next to me on the couch. I felt him spit on my hole and then heard him spit again, followed by the squishy sound of him using it to lube up his dick. The warm velvety head nudged into the outer ring of my hole, gently rubbing up and down, wiggling from side to side as my sphincter pulsed on his head and he moaned.

It felt so fucking good, but I was well aware that he was going to try to fuck me bareback and I was about to stop it, but he stuck the head in just past the outer ring. Popping in with ease, no friction this time, only the pleasure like when his tongue was in me. “Mmm, fuuUuck,” I groaned quietly to myself, letting my head fall down and rest on the back of the couch. I felt my hole widening as he shoved it all the way in, hitting my prostate and instantly shooting pleasure into my body. My head popped back up, “Ungh…mmmm,” I moaned pretty loud and he covered my mouth with his left hand as he slowly started pulling back out, then quickly back into me. Making sure to hit that spot again and get another moan from me as he set a rhythm.

He leaned back over me, still covering my mouth with one hand, his other massive arm wrapped around my waist as he pulled my ass to his thrusting hips. "You like that?" He whispered in my ear.

"Mmhmm" I mumbled through his hand, my eyes rolling into the back of my head a little more with every ping on my prostate.

He started to pick up the pace.

"You’re sure you don’t have anything?" he asked again in a low grumble, sliding his hands down my body to my hips as he continued to fuck me, thrusting harder now.

Asking a second time gave me a hint of concern, "Ungh…yeah, are you?"

“Mmm, yeah,” he groaned as his cock stretched out my hole.

His thrusting hit my prostate every time, the intense pleasure was making my legs weak and my moans louder. I reached down and started playing with my dick which had long lost its erection, but it quickly came back to life.

"You just needed this dick raw, didn't you?" He whispered, slowing his thrusting, but keeping the intensity.

I was lost to pleasure and had forgotten he had taken the condom off. Before I could answer he gripped my hips tightly and started pounding my ass, the pleasure and pain combination was so intense, I just moaned and tried to match his speed with my hand on my dick. I could hear him starting to breathe faster and heavier.

"Your ass feels so good on my big dick," he grumbled, as he pummeled.

I moaned and tried to flex the muscles I use in the shower to cum while standing up, feeling my ass clench around his invading cock as he pegged my prostate, I couldn’t help but moan. I felt my precum leaking out onto my fist as I stroked and it hit me that he was leaking precum into my ass.

A little worried I asked again, "You're sure you don’t have anything right?"

He chuckled and moaned out a sweaty, “Yeah." Then leaned over my back, his sweaty torso clinging to me like a magnet as he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me back onto his dick as his hips thrust up into me and he moaned.

“You’re going to pull out, right?” I felt his dick getting thicker inside me as my forehead lay on the back of the couch and I pumped myself closer to orgasm.

He kissed my neck and whispered, "I'm gonna nut in you."

My sex-fogged brain went into panic as my head popped back up and he thrust harder and deeper than ever. I was in total ecstasy and just let him pound me even harder. Feeling my orgasm on the edge and my brain convincing me this is what I wanted I let him keep fucking me raw, getting closer to cumming inside me with every thrust.

His hands moved back up my torso and he wrapped his arms around my chest, "You want my nut?" He whispered in a barely audible voice.

I didn’t say anything, I just moaned in pleasure and let him continue, it felt so good I just wanted to cum, I fist my dick harder and faster, flexing my ass around his big beautiful cock.

With his hot breath on my ear, he whispered, "I’m about to bust in you." He groaned and curled his hips up into me with a hard thrust, then a short pull out and another hard thrust followed by a deeper moan. His cock swelled inside me and I felt him tense, his cock throbbing in me and a sudden warmth that felt so good my moans matched his. I could feel the heat of his breath from his grunting on my neck as he twitched and unloaded inside me, breeding me for the first time in my life. He gave me a few more deliberate thrusts, squirting the last of his nut inside me.

It was all so intense I couldn’t hold back and I felt all of my muscles tense as my hole clamped down on his cum covered dick and my balls tightened so hard as I started shooting my load all over the back of his couch. I groaned and twitched under his hot sweaty body as he held me through my orgasm until I finally stopped cumming and could breathe again.

He slowly pulled out twitching a little as his sensitive cock plopped out of my well fucked hole and we both let out a small groan of exhausted pleasure. I felt some cum leaking from my hole down to my balls. It was gross and hot at the same time.

He slowly righted himself then walked wobbly-legged to his kitchen and came back with a roll of paper towels, tearing a sheet off and handing it to me as he tore one off to wipe the cum off his cock.

We cleaned up quietly, just catching our breath and stealing glances at each other’s bodies.

“Was it what you wanted?” He asked as I wiped my cum off his couch.

I almost laughed at the question, shaking my head no and grinning, “I don’t know what I expected, but holy shit…”

We both dressed quickly, per the unspoken code of Grindr hookups. I wobbly-leg walked back to my place, taking my time just trying to wrap my mind around all that happened tonight.