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Love Like Sunshine (Patreon)

Published:
2024-10-01 04:58:52
Edited:
2024-10-01 05:08:57
Imported:
2025-01
Tags:

Content

You fill my eager heart with such desire,
Every kiss you give sets my soul on fire,
I give myself in sweet surrender,
My one and only love~

haha get serenaded idiot

In which Merry’s attempted romantic gesture is blown clear out of the water by Eleanor’s. Merry is a big flustered idiot rn because holy shit he did not know his girlfriend could croon like THAT

I meant for this scene to be nostalgic and soft and romantic but honestly all I can think of is Eleanor seeing that banjo coming out of its case and promptly deciding to shut that shit down before it started

Files

Comments

JoMama1516

If Merry were to never cheat on Eleanor, would their marriage still have survived? I know in another comment of yours that Ellie was aware that their marriage was struggling. I honestly can't see Merry admitting his desire to be wanted nor his fears of everything drifting away from him, but would Ellie be able to force it out of him in a last ditch attempt before she calls for divorce? Or would Merry have done something equally as stupid regardless of it not being cheating, and still end up divorced? Sorry if my questions are worded weirdly

Fox Lover

With the more info we got on Merry it has me wondering: how much of his faith and politics is genuine and how much of it is because he gets power?

mirarevias

ELEANOR I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS BANJO SLANDER IN MY FEED!!! LISTEN TO SOME BLUEGRASS Anyway-- God, the more we learn about Eleanor the clearer it is that she was (still is and always has been) ENTIRELY too good for Merry. It breaks my heart to see these glimpses into the past because it's clear that they did love each other very genuinely at one point... And Merry was just too fucking greedy (and jealous, now that I've had a chance to read the comments on your other post) to enjoy the good he already had. I'm glad that Eleanor did lose those rose colored glasses, at least. And she managed to get herself away from his spiral downwards into deepest bigotry. And obviously, like you mentioned, there was a time she believed in his dream and agreed with his sentiments. Which is an unfortunate reality for a lot of people like them who are products of their upbringing and circumstances, but at least Eleanor TRIES to change and be better. Merry was just too afraid of vulnerability to even try. It reminds me (in a way) of this couple my bestie wrote in periphery to me. Both her OCs, both met when they were young and dumb and fell head over heels, but they couldn't communicate effectively and their relationship fell apart after several years of on again off again drifting to and fro from each other because they couldn't ever have an honest conversation, and every time they tried it fell into huge arguments that were then "made up" by angry sex that devolved into something almost akin to hate sex, but not quite. A real view into how even the most well-meaning of people and the strongest looking relationships will be doomed to fail if they can't be honest with each other. It sucks because I loved their chemistry (and both of them are now paired up with my OCs instead lol), but in the end they realized how bad they were for each other because their relationship had polarized them so much that they were no longer the people they thought they were. This gives me much of the same vibes. And I imagine (from both these things and my own unfortunate personal experience) that Eleanor likely saw the signs long before she accepted them for what they were, and it eventually culminated in her being unable to ignore it anymore when Merry went and got his secretary who was the same age as their eldest son pregnant. I wonder when she started doubting? Did she do the same thing I did, and rationalize it, or gaslight herself into not believing what she saw? You let it eat away at you for so long without even realizing it because of how much leg work you're doing to shield yourself from the truth, it becomes second nature. God, it sucks. Why do we do that? 😔 (I now know why and have for a while... But looking back at it now, knowing better... It's hard not to be angry at myself for letting someone (several someones) treat me so badly for so long because I was afraid to face life without them. Especially because now I have to unlearn all of my unhealthy behaviors I developed to cope. The denial was unequivocally easier.) And I blabbered again. Sorry about that, the situations you write and illustrate just never fail to get me thinking. Unrelated to my spiel but MAN do I see a lot of Toffee AND Honey in Merry's expression, here. Got the same goofy, dopey twitterpated face.

FancylionFarts

I feel you here merry...if someone that lovely started singing to me my heart couldn't take it 😳🫣

lopoddity
>>151011927

He genuinely is a very spiritual person, but certainly not to the degree he pretends to be for the church. Early on, a lot of his religious beliefs were even kinda radical for the time, as he believed that god was found in music and art and in people's power to change the world for the better. The individual IS god, in a way. He still kinda believes this, but preaches prosperity gospel (god is a mysterious mighty authority that demands you give him money if you want a better life) because that's what gets his audience fired up and thrusting handfuls of cash at him.

lopoddity
>>151010343

Their marriage not only could have survived, it could have thrived. But it would've taken a lot more than Merry simply Not Cheating on Eleanor, because the cheating was only a symptom of a larger problem- his feelings of inadequacy, fear of losing control, and inability to admit how lost and lonely he felt as he'd become more disconnected from his family, leading the ever-expanding church. Merry needs therapy, and lots of it, to work out his deep, deeeeeep insecurities that poison his relationships with his wife and children. Eleanor needs to attend couple's therapy with him, so she can hear his feelings of jealousy and resentment toward her, and express her own frustration at how he'd all but shut down as a husband and father over the years. She's never tried to outshine him (much), and she'd rather share the stage with him, have them both home to enjoy each other's company, spending time with their children like they used to. Also...they'd have to give up the church. It is the growing tumor that is widening the chasm between them. It is their third child, a massive obligation that perpetually demands BOTH their attention, draws them away from each other, leaves them too tired and distracted to interact with their kids. Merry and Eleanor absolutely have enough money at this point to retire from the church and pursue something else with their lives. So a time would come when Merry would have to choose. Does he want to stubbornly cling to the unquestioned power and adoration of his church, or does he want to make an effort again (that might not even work), with his frowning wife, his surly, avoidant teen daughter, his frustrating, most-certainly-queer son? Is he willing to put in the work....? If yes, it's entirely possible that he and Ellie go back to making music and art for the fun of it and rediscover why they fell in love, and his love of music ALSO gives him an in to bond with his kids, to hear what they like to listen to and sing, to hear about the problems in their lives, their fear of not living up to his expectations. He could come to know them and love them, as people, not merely extensions of himself- and he could reassure them, to his own surprise, that he will love them no matter what. Yes, Toffee....no matter what. Yes, Topher. No matter what. Yes, Ellie. Forever and always. It would've taken SO much work (and a good amount of luck), but Merry could have been happy. All he had to do was choose to be.

Lammergayier

Oh my god he looks JUST like Toffee here I'm normal. I'm normal about what Merry could have been

Lammergayier
>>151010343

God, if only....... But then Honey wouldn't exist. I wonder what would have happened to Maple in this AU

lopoddity
>>151036913

In the future, Eleanor intuitively knowing Toffee is in love before he does (because he makes the exact same goofy faces as Merry). Also Ellie watching Topher sometimes give a familiar-looking soft glance at Mal, then cackling like a madwoman

Corinne Stephenson
>>151010343

This analysis absolutely breaks my heart. Because that's all that separates SO many people from living their best lives: themselves. Toffee is the example of what Merry could have been, because he finally let go of his fragile ego and decided to be open and genuine. But damn you, Lop. You've got me feeling bad for MERRY.

Buttermaster

Not the Ned Fulmer wife guy to cheater w an employee pipeline (/j). They genuinely look so very cute here! I love their designs.

Angsty Ram

Impeccable music choice 👌 It’s funny, I’ve always thought that Toffee was his dad’s double but with this one, I am seeing Topher too and I just love that so much I do think yellow really suits Eleanor. Queen Bee 🐝💛

Scyllarus
>>151010343

I tried to respond earlier to a response you had made on a different post talking about not being sure how to kill Merry off, but then a hurricane murdered our power so. But thinking about the choice Merry made reminds me of what I had attempted to post SO here it is, more or less: I can't deny the attraction of emotional catharsis? But I always like seeing stories that parallel real life, and some people simply never get over their issues...so while I could definitely see a timeline in which Merry is able to be vulnerable, laying in his hospital bed, to the only person who hasn't completely abandoned him, the person who reminds him so frustratingly much of himself. He opens up to Toffee - at first begrudgingly, a sort of resentful grumble at his situation, but in the noisy isolation of that hospital room Merry eventually opens up about his childhood. About what made him what he was, what he gave to his children, what he expected from them and why. Maybe Toffee's heard it before, but maybe it hits different from the frail dying man who is too weak to even whisper for long. Maybe Toffee is even able to convince one of his siblings, or maybe he talks to his mother about it and it brings a flood of old memories. Or maybe Merry dies in the arms of his church. Maybe the members of his congregation come by for short visits, bringing flowers and cards and food he can't muster up the appetite to eat. He finds small spots of comfort and pride in this, but mostly feels disquieted and sad - every memory that comes to mind is of his family, and he can't find a way to talk about it, not to the gossipy old biddies that insisted on sitting with him longest. When he is alone, he cries. ...or maybe both. Maybe it's this incredibly lonely near-death experience that pushes him to meet with his son. Maybe it's a well-meaning nurse that calls his next of kin, maybe he has a conversation (imagine - what if it's with a wounded Angel?) driving home the idea that he should re-engage with his family. Idk!

Alight

I like how versions of Ellie have developed increasingly poofy and curly hair. Does she straighten it in the present, curl it in the past, or something else?

lopoddity
>>151107004

Thanks! Ellie just has magic barbie doll hair that shifts textures and style depending on how I wanna draw it. :3 Buuuuut if you wanted a logical take, we could say she had a big ass all-natural Angela Davis afro in her youth, and alternated between natural curls, relaxed waves, and straightened styles later on....and that present day old Eleanor's long wavy locks are simply a wig, or sew-in extensions, with her being almost "bald" underneath (she still has fur on her head, just no "hair" fur, just like Merry), with her teeny floppy dog ears hiding inside the wig.

lopoddity
>>151107004

Mal: Gosh, your hair is really pretty. <3 Eleanor: Oh, you want it? :) Here *yoinks off wig*

Solnexux

OH LOP THIS IS THE ONE DUDE 😭!!! for some reason this piece resonated with my little heart on an exponential level. the tones and colors you used convey such a sweet soft moment between these two and in a way, that only as an audience can really retroactively understand, this moment must truly be bittersweet.. and i think that’s honestly the feeling i’ve had seeing these two while they’re young! the way you’re putting a personality to not only them but their love is so strangely agonizing 😭 knowing how they are in present time and seeing where they were implies that they have so much potential… im always excited to see such strong poc representation in your characters and especially eleanor lately!! and to see her with what seems like her polar opposite in merry, for me, draws such great reference to real life struggles of some interracial relationships. i myself, am in one and unlearning certain social patterns of implicit bias and underlying racism have been necessary throughout our relationship. of course class can also have a very strong influence on how this dynamic works as well but i wonder if there’s anything they had to deal with here, or if this kind of micro racism doesn’t really exist inside fuzzbuts since it would be a little more difficult to discriminate against your own species! anyways- im sure it’s in the making but all of this makes me so curious as to what lead these two to have the current relationship that they do, and more so, what lead merry to be such a piece of evangelical shit!

Nette Marie
>>151107004

Interjecting here because I got the funniest imagine here. I imagine Tobias or Topher "stealing" her wigs as kids and running off with them and pretending to be their mom. Then Ellie just chasing them through the house trying to get her wigs back smiling and trying not to laugh so she doesn't encourage this weird behavior (I say weird because I feel like Merry would be livid at Tobias doing this. Not sure about Topher). I'd imagine Topher would still snag his mom's wigs and do this when he's grown up just to playfully irk his mom. Id imagine she'd still chase after him and Mal would find it amusing or go "Topher give your mom's wig back."

Res Hound

Turns out the real villain wasn't Merry, it was ☆*:. Society .:*☆ (but fr I like that your characters are all multi dimensional people)

Nette Marie
>>151107004

Maybe Ellie and Tobias talk about hair and wig care (is that the same thing? Genuinely I don't know) on visits.

Alight
>>151107004

That's a really fun idea, so long as she already had the wig off before they ran off with it. If it works the same way my friend's does, it would be firmly clipped into her existing hair, making pulling it off a painful prospect.

Alight
>>151107004

That would be pretty in character for both of them, and I can see Ellie doing that either cheekily or wholly earnestly.

Amber

He looks just like toffee here

MiyaTheGoldenFlower

I think the other reason this hurts so much and make in a way pity this proud old pastor dog and everyone in this thing, it's because this marriage broke because selfsabotage and ego of one of the partners, it could be saved, but this person choose to dig deeper in the mistakes. It wasn't a unloving marriage that should have break years ago, it wasn't abusive (I mean the was some disfuntion with the kids too), it wasn't a manipulative third person that with devious actions messing up the family (like in my case, damn that evil narcissist disguise as friend almost broke my parents marriage and hurt my family in such ways, thank God my parents realize before it was too late and cut ties). It's the type of hurt of "We were so happy, what happen? When everything go so wrong?" Reading all the other comments and new info, I'm actually very surprised of Ellie, I mean for people talk shit about me when my ex was the one who is wrong and he's the one complaining about me, blaming me? I would be soooo furious and try to defend myself. But at the same time I admire her too, she won't lower herself, she knows her worth, and shows her pride, the good type of pride. Sometimes I wonder if under all the obvious hate against Maple, maybe Ellie feels a little bit of pity, but pity like "Oh girl you are so pathetic that it's make me feel sad" Also this proves just how shitty and unkind people in these communities can be, one thing I never understand about affairs is why people blame the partner who is decisived and not the one who cheats? Like no matter the gender, they always blame the victim. Even so I think is this case they are a little cowards cuz if they look down to Maple so in her face, they should be as brave to do the same with Merry, but again with him they have to loose, so they go with the weak one instead. And then she gets all this vocal hate for every part when Merry was also to blame. But... maybe just maybe this is karma too for Maple, cuz again sure she was taken advantage for and older figure yet she choose to be just as hurtful as him, I meet people in Maple situation and yet they try so hard to be the best version of themselves for their kids, they know that the situation is messy, they recognize their mistakes. It's very sad because this people see their "marriage to safe face" like a business thing, there's no love for their spouse or try to be play happy couple, they know where the line is. But in their case no wonder Maple tends to over consume pills, and Merry drowns in his works... They even try to make it work? Or they are in this delusion of "happy marriage" the if we don't talk about it it doesn't exist? I wonder if Maple have ever see old picture of Merry and Ellie as a young couple or just Merry's old family, and feel... anger, because shame should be feel by both, because Merry and Maple make the mistake, but the one that actually have a wife and kids, the one that have more to loose was Merry, nobody twist his arm to cheat with her, there was many many other ladies who could have choose. How could you? How could I? And that brings me certain question, do Honey knows about the affair? Because sure she notices that her dad loves exaggerating events and her mom is much younger that her dad, but when she meet her bothers... They never tell her or she makes this discovery by accident? For someone like Honey I think things like affairs are look in a very bad light or she would justifie the actions of her parents? Oooohh this brings another question, Honey and Ellie know each other? Like they have even talk? Because again I have this crazy idea that if maybe just maybe Ellie doesn't see Honey as "the spawn of that homewrecker" maybe she see this loose very lonely child that need some company? Or maybe, just for a distance, Honey see the actual healthy loving bond between Ellie and her brothers and feel a little bit sad? Why can mom act like miss Elliea even just a little? She's so supportive, listing to her sons, loving but let them breathe... Miss Ellie is also so charming, proud, opinionated, independent, a natural leader, such beautiful working woman... Why can mom be like her? Why anyone would leave such amazing woman? Ufff of that even happen I can imagine Maple being destroy and even more jealous because now her baby "prefers" Eleanor over her. I'm sorry about the many many words, it's just so interesting to see your characters and how real they feel, so fun to read an do analysis.