Jackass Parody Script *rough draft* (Patreon)

Now this one is interesting and may be long idk yet! but ehres the rough draft script!

                                   Welcome To Head Ass!

*Shows myron*

Myron: Hi im myron and welcome to head ass!

*car tries to hit myron just eats it*

myron: Yall feel something?

*Jackass music plays for the intro*

*Shows alexidria on a slingshot*

Alexis: Hi im alexidria and this is "Shark bait woo ha ha"

juicy: You ready?

*Alexidria gets comfortable*

Alexis: READY!

*Juciy pulls the slingshot and launches alexidria across the river over some

 horny sharks dressed as ricardo*

*Alexidria screaming fuck and ouch and why you horny shit like dat*

juciy: Well damn she bout to get raped.

*cuts to next stunt*

*shows myron in the studio*

myron: Hi im myron and this is the "Lil Nas"

*Myron records his country song and it hits the top of the country charts*

*shows kkk staring at there computer*

kkk: do my eyes decieve me?? wait! IS THIS A NIGGER!?!

*cuts off to next stunt*

*Shows dre outside*

dre: wassup ya'll im dre and this is "Brave Black Man*

*dre walks up to  random white cop*

dre: Hey man how your doing?

*cop looks at him punches himself then shoots dre*

dre: YO WHAT THE FUCK!!

*Shows pandora & Aleixdria*

Pandora: Hi im pandora.

alexis: *Sighs* and im Alexidria..

pandora: And this is "Hide N Go Piss..."

alexidria: Lets get this one over with..

rocky: Ight R kelly your ready?

rkelly: IM FIGHTING FOR MY FUCKIN LIFE!!

*rocky starts counting down from 10 and pandora & alexis run and hide*

alexis: AH FUCK!!

*they finish counting r kelly starts looking for them*

*shows pandora hiding behind a tree rkelly pops up*

rkelly: I love all the women!

*rkelly pisses on pandora*

pandora: YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*shows alexis hiding*

Alexis: i swear to God imma kill TOONZIES for coming up with this!

*r kelly finds her*

rkelly: I love all the women!

*rkelly pisses on alexis*

alexis: FUCK MY LIFE!!!

*Shows myron and rocky evreryone laughing*

Juicy: Now that was funny!

*Juicy gets pissed blasted too*

*cuts to next stunt*

*Shows myron and rocky*

myron: Hey wassup im myron and this is "Pure torture"

*Myron turns on jump force loading screen and they stare at it and start randomly puking.*

rocky: I CANT TAKE THE PRESSURE!

*rocky jumps out the window*

*Cuts to next scene*

*Shows rocky in alexidrias house*

rocky: hi my name is rocky.. and this is "Morning Alarm"

*Shows tea cup sleeping near a wall*

*rocky kicks him to the wall and teacup gets mad and all swole and attacks rocky*

myron: SHIT RUN RUN RUN!!!!!

*Cuts to the next stunt*

*shows Juicy wewe on a laptop*

Juicy: Hi I’m juicy wewe and this is "Internet Troll"

*juicy goes on random youtube comments and commented "Nigger"

*Shows a angry group of black man*

juicy: Now i gotta wait til they reply!

*Shows a bunch of black guys behind him*

juicy: Ah shit nuggets.

*cuts to next stunt*

*shows rocky myron and daniel*

rocky: hi im rocky and this "The Jeuss Game"

daniel: You ready to die for our sins nigga??

rocky: No..

myron: Ight get the cross!

*Daniel and javon pull put the cross and lays rocky on the cross and nails him*

rocky: BRUH BRUH CHILL CHILL!!!

myron: HOLD STILL NIGGA!!!

rocky: WAIT WAIT WAIT IM NOT READY!!

*Myron nails rockys hands and feet to the cross and rocky is screaming*

myron: HOLD HIM STILL!!! HOLD HIM STILL!!!

*They stand the cross up with rocky on it, Rocky is panting*

Daniel: We out of thorn crowns so we got this crown from burger king.

rocky: There were done! now get me down from here!

myron: Nope not yet! its time to crucify!!

*myron pulls out a spear and stabs rocky and its just silent*

Daniel: Damn whats taking him so long? isnt he suppose to come back alive?

myron: I think thats what happens in the bible.

alexis: Idk bruh that bible shit is so confusing.

*cuts to next scene*

*Shows Dahimr and Zero*

Zero: What yall know about these popeyes biscuits?

*Zero puts the biscuit on the ground*

*Zero and dahmir take off there pants*

Zero: Hi im zero!

dahmir: *Sigh* and im dahmir..

zero: And this is "Soggy Biscuit"

dahmir: Lets get this over with..

*Zero and dahmir start jerking off on the biscuit*

*zero making gay grunting noises*

dahmir: BRUH MOAN IN YOUR HEAD!!

zero: OHH! OH GRANDMA!!

*zero nuts on te biscuits*

Zero: BET IM SAFE!!!

alexis: DAMN NIGGA JUST NUT ALREADY! DAMN!!!

dahmir: BRUH IM TRYING I CANT DO IT WHEN PPL ARE WATCHING!!

zero: Your not jerking off right! here i gotchu!

*Zero grabs dahmirs dick and starts aggressively jerking it*

dahmir: BRUH STOP THIS IS GAY THIS IS GAY!!! LET GO OF ME YOU HOMO!!!

Zero: HOLD STILL LET ME FINISH!!

*everyone is laughing*

*dahmir nuts*

rocky: Ight dahmir you nutted last! you gotta eat the biscuit!

dahmir: ..And if i dont?

*teacup pops up*

teacup: YOU GET DIS WORK NIGGA!!

dahmir: CHILL CHILL CHILL!! OK ILL EAT IT!!!

*dahmir picks up the biscuit and stares and it*

*dahmir sniffs it and he pukes*

*everyone starts laughing*

Zero: Eat up bro!

dahmir: I dont wanna do it!!

alexis: Here ill add some seasoning to it so itll taste better!

*alexis sprinkles seasoning on the biscuit*

*dahmir takes a bite and pukes everywhere*

*everyone dies laughing*

zero: Look at the camera bro and smile!!

*Dahmir pukes*

zero: Idk why your complaing nigga its just a biscuit!

*zero picks up the biscuit and eats it*

zero: Mmm! Not bad! salty! The texture is moist! Seasoning on point! WHY YOU BITCHING FOR?!!

*dahmir pukes again*

*Cuts to next scene*

*SHows billy in a shopping cart*

Dre: Hi my name is Dre and this is "Extreme Frogger"

juicy: 3 2 1! GO!!

dre: A YUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

*Dre rolls down a steep hill into on going traffic and gets fucked up badly*

juicy: Whelp that ended up badly. Like expected.

juicy: Dont try this at home.

The end.