Self-portrait video from tonight. (Patreon)
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Tonight I’m at home in Brooklyn. It was golden hour just a few minutes ago. I love this light. I have so many thoughts about the world right now, yet with the psychological warfare and seemingly disparate polarities I’m choosing to spend more time listening than speaking, observing than seeking. Existence is such an interesting phenomenon. I hope to write more in my journal soon, to put thoughts down on paper. I go through varying periods of writing, reading, experiencing, socializing, running, resting, and communicating. Right now my only intention is to stay as healthy, sane, and stable as possible during these tumultuous times. Overall, I’m very hopeful and happy for what is to come in the next few months to next few years. I received a letter in the mail from my dear friend and teacher, Joy Seidler, who I refer to as my shaman, as my experience working with her has been the closest I’ve felt to being one with the earth. In the letter I just opened, she asked me if I have seen the movie ‘portrait of a woman on fire.’ This is the second time this movie has come up in conversation for me over the past 24 hours. Just as I made note of this and experienced this information intake, I had just finished filming this video of myself. When I looked at the footage I realized that this light, this bright light, this orange color, is like fire. I feel like I AM, this IS, a portrait of a woman on fire... I am fire, you are fire, we are fire. We are the light. As I learned from a very intelligent artist I met yesterday, Tasha Dougé, “fire is the only light source that can destroy and heal.” We heal through and from our destruction. The world is healing as the systems are being broken down, cracking, the light is breaking in.