Celestial Worm Part 6 (Patreon)

Riley was pulled out of her daydreaming about ways to create a bionic super soldier when the moving truck she was riding in lurched, making her wonder if Crawler had jumped out the back. "Did you feel that?" she asked as she checked the passenger side mirror, wanting to make sure she hadn't imagined it.

"Yeah," Shatterbird replied as she checked the driver's mirror to check to see if he'd jumped out the back or the side, something he'd done occasionally if he'd gotten bored enough. She reached up with her free hand and knocked on the back of the van. "Are you back there?!"

Riley frowned slightly when she realized that no one was swerving or crashing or doing anything to indicate that they'd seen anything out of the ordinary. "Crawler?" she asked when she realized that she couldn't hear him moving around. "We should stop."

Shatterbird scowled as she grabbed her walkie talkie and pushed the button. "Something's wrong with the load, we're taking the next exit."

"Roger," Jack replied over the walkie talkie as he turned his blinker on and pulled off the freeway, deciding it was time to grab something to eat anyway and wait for the rain to let up as the visibility was shit.

Riley jumped when she heard the sound of metal being ripped apart coming from in front of them and watched the top of the RV slide off. "Fiddlesticks!"

Shatterbird spun the wheel and hit the brakes, trying to stop the truck before it hit whatever the hell had destroyed the RV or the top of the RV. The truck tumbled when the tires 'spontaneously' exploded and the rims slid on the asphalt.

Hatchet Face scowled as he pulled himself out of the remains of the RV, wondering if they'd hit something or if a cape had tried to kill him as he'd felt something strike him in the back hard enough to slam his face into the floor of the RV. He scanned the surrounding area then focused on the wrecked moving van with a broken and blood splattered windshield from Shatterbird’s remains. 'Damn, she was a good opener,' he mused as he turned to check on Jack and Mannequin. He was a bit surprised when he looked at the driver's seat and realized that Jack had lost his head.

He frowned when he couldn't find any sign of Mannequin or the Siberian. He stared when he turned and saw a man in a bright yellow and blue spandex suit that left very little to the imagination standing next to a busty blonde teenager wearing a black and white outfit with a white S on her chest standing in the middle of the road glaring at him. "You're going to die."

"My name is Kara Zor-El and I'm going to fuck you," the girl stated.

The man in yellow sighed. "It's fuck you up, not fuck you."

"What's the difference?" the girl asked in confusion, completely ignoring the villain.

"Lots," the man turned to look at Hatchet Face. "Are you going to come quietly or are we going to do this the fun way?"

"Isn't that supposed to be the hard way?" the girl asked.

"No," the man replied as long metallic blades erupted from between his knuckles.

"You don't know what you're dealing with," Hatchet Face said as he jumped down from the wreckage and stalked toward the capes, looking forward to crushing the life out of them.

"Shut your trap," the man replied as a naked woman with monochrome tiger striped skin and hair appeared next to Hatchet Face.

"You're fucked and you're too stupid to understand," Hatchet Face replied as he stalked toward the idiot with blades sticking out of his hands.

Kara gestured and the Siberian popped.

"What the hell?!" Hatchet Face blurted out, wondering if the Siberian was just fucking with them, at least until the Siberian reappeared looking angry.

"That's annoying," Kara replied as she made a swirling gesture, causing the Siberian to pop a second time.

Hatchet Face changed the girl, intent on hacking her apart with his axe as soon as he got close enough to block her powers.

The man with the claws sprinted at the brute and slashed through Hatchet Face's arm, sending it and the axe to the asphalt then proceeded to cut through his spine, causing the brute to collapse to the ground unable to move his limbs.

0o0o0

Eidolon pulled his attention from the monitor that was showing an image of a blonde teenager and a man with sideburns in a horrible yellow and blue costume and focused on Contessa. "What the hell happened?"

"I don't know," Contessa admitted. "I was talking to a contact in France when every path I had that involved the Nine vanished. Were you anywhere near Kansas today?"

"This is the first time I've left my office all day, I've been buried in paperwork," Eidolon complained, pissed that someone had managed to kill the Nine and he hadn’t been involved since he'd been ordered to leave them alone.

Contessa gestured toward the image frozen on the screen as Legend walked into the meeting room. "That means one or both of the new capes are blindspots."

"Were you able to read her lips when she was talking to Hatchet Face?" Eidolon asked Alexandria, glad that they were dead, annoyed that he wasn't the one that did it and curious about the capes that had managed to take out the Nine and make it look easy.

"The video wasn't the best, just bits and pieces until the last part when the girl told Hatchet Face to rot in hell, reached down and broke his neck without any sign of effort," Alexandria replied, a bit unnerved for reasons she couldn't put her fingers on.

"We're lucky to have the video," Number Man pointed out. "If the gas attendant hadn't been on break taking selfies, we wouldn't have anything."

"How strong would you have to be to break Hatchet Face's neck?" Legend asked as he walked over.

"Assuming you were immune to his power, at least seven or eight," Alexandria suggested, not actually sure because of his ability to nullify powers. "Did any of them survive?"

"Jack lost his head and Shatterbird should have been wearing her seatbelt." Legend smiled as remembered the shocked look frozen of Jack's severed head. "The techs recovered one of Mannequin's arms but couldn't find the rest of him. There's evidence that Crawler was in the back of the U-haul before the crash but the damage would have been different if he'd been in the back during the crash and he would have just ripped his way out of the wreck."

"Any word about the Siberian?" Alexandria asked, surprised that the girl had been able to affect her since the Siberian was immune to most powers.

Legend shook his head. "I don't know, one of the locals said the Supergirl knockoff popped her like a cheap condom five more times then hit her with bitching red laser eye beams of doom which caused her to scream in pain before popping."

"Cheap condom?" Alexandria asked.

"His words, not mine," Legend replied. "Jay had a rather vulgar mouth but he was happy to fill in the details that the video didn't catch."

"Supergirl?" Doctor Mother asked, not sure who they were talking about.

"She was a fictional cape from before Scion showed up, she had flight, super strength, heat vision and a dozen other powers," Legend explained.

"Can you find the missing members of the Nine?" Eidolon asked Contessa.

"No, they're probably being held too close to the blindspot…" Contessa trailed off as her path that involved keeping track of Nilbog ended. "We need to check on Nilbog, my path just ended."

"We should probably get back before we're missed," Alexandria suggested.

"Door," Eidolon snapped, rather annoyed that someone had managed to deal with Nilbog while he'd been stuck leaving the shit alone because he might be useful.

0o0o0

Leet jumped as Warlock teleported into the warehouse. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"Nope, do you want a copy of another Tinker specialty?" Taylor asked, figuring she'd wait to talk to Amy about Bonesaw's power since she'd accidently picked it up permanently which meant there wasn't a rush to give it to someone.

"What does it do?" Leet asked.

"Contained environmental systems," Taylor replied.

"Hit me," Leet replied with a grin.

Taylor gave him a copy of Mannequin's power and stared at him when it stuck on the first try, making her wonder if it was easier to give Tinkers extra Tinker powers or if it was just chance. "Okay, have fun."

Leet shrugged when she vanished then walked over and grabbed his notebook, having some new ideas that he wanted to play with.

0o0o0

Legend stared at the blonde haired teenage girl carrying a bag of heads. "Let me get this straight, you have a bag of eight heads from the Nine, your name is Copyright Infringement Lass and you want cash, does that sum it up?"

"Yes and technically, I only have five heads, I had to vaporize the Siberian and Crawler to make sure they stayed dead and I left Jack's head at the scene so people would know it was the Nine," Taylor explained, doing her best to avoid making a fool out of herself because Legend was talking to her.

"Do you have any idea how much cash that is?" Legend asked. "We're going to have to load it on a pallet."

"I don't have a problem with that," Taylor assured him.

"I'll make some calls," Legend said, knowing it was going to take at least a couple of hours to get that much cash together. "Something else to consider, The Nine had a kill order so there's not much I can do about your method of bringing us proof of their deaths but the Protectorate generally frowns on taking heads for bounties, normally people bring in the entire corpse."

Taylor winced when she caught his thoughts questioning her mental stability. "I had to incinerate the bodies, Bonesaw left biological countermeasures in their chests, I didn't want that crap spreading."

"I'll note that in the file," Legend told her, relieved that she wasn't as crazy as he'd assumed.

"Thanks," Taylor replied, glad that she could clear things up and that he didn't think she was insane since he was one of her heroes.

"Can I get your autograph?" Legend asked as he handed her a small leather journal.

"Of course," Taylor replied, surprised that a hero was asking for her signature. "Where do you want me to sign?"

"The bookmarked page under Mouse Protector's name," Legend replied as he handed her a pen.

Taylor opened the book and signed, "Copyright Infringement Lass!" in his journal under Mouse Protector's name. She handed him the journal back then pulled a palm sized metal plate out of her pocket along with a pair of welding glasses. "Can you do me a favor and sign it with your power? I'm a big fan."

"Of course," Legend replied, not seeing a problem with etching a keepsake for the girl that had dealt with the Nine.

'Awesome!' Taylor mentally squealed as she put the glasses on and watched Legend etch his name on the metal plate, figuring that gave her a backup way to grab a copy of his power in case she couldn't copy his power permanently while she was there.

0o0o0

"Are you sure that you're okay?" Carol asked as she carefully poked at Amy's ribs.

"I'm fine, I was wearing armor," Amy replied, not used to Carol fusing over her.

"Where did you get armor?" Carol asked.

"She has a girlfriend that is a tinker," Vicky cheerfully offered.

"She's…" Amy trailed off as Carol cut in, "Fantastic, as long as she makes you happy."

"She made Vicky a set, I don't think that counts," Amy argued.

"Okay, we've got a girlfriend," Vicky replied smugly.

Carol laughed as Sarah walked in the front door.

"Did you hear the news?" Sarah asked.

"About my daughter kicking ass and wiping out the Merchants?" Carol asked cheerfully.

"Vicky did what?" Sarah asked.

"No, Amy kicked the shit out of the Merchants," Carol replied as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and pulled up the Video of Amy destroying the Merchants that she'd saved.

"Amy? What?" Sarah asked.

"Don't piss off the White Mage," Vicky teased.

"Vicky," Amy complained halfheartedly.

"Wow, she really does take after you, that elbow strike…" Sarah shook her head as she realized she'd gotten distracted. "No, the Nine are dead."

"How many of them?" Carol asked.

"Clean sweep," Sarah replied.

"Best day ever, we're going to the bar!" Carol declared.

"Hell yeah!" Mark agreed, feeling better than he'd felt in years.

"What about the kids?" Sarah asked.

Carol pulled her wallet out of her jacket pocket and pulled out a wad of cash and handed it to Amy. "Here, have fun in a responsible manner."

"Okay?" Amy asked, not used to Carol being happy with her or just handing her money.

"Responsible?" Vicky asked.

"Someone has to," Carol replied with an uncharacteristic grin as she left through the front door, looking forward to getting a nice buzz to celebrate the fact that the Nine were dead.

"Be ready to heal our livers tomorrow, the Nine are dead!" Neil shouted cheerfully then left with Sarah.

Mark gave the girls a smile then followed the other adults with a spring in his steps.

"So, that happened," Vicky offered, wondering if she should call in a master stranger event or get ice cream.

"Ice cream?" Amy asked.

"Ice cream," Vicky replied as she pulled out her phone and started trying to figure out what happened to the nine.

"And there goes Jacky," Amy said cheerfully when she saw his head go flying.

"We should probably hurry, there are going to be a lot of people celebrating," Vicky said.

0o0o0

Taylor glanced up from 'fixing' the cellphone that she'd looted from thugs in the alley, making sure people couldn't track it and that she didn't have to pay for calls when Amy and Vicky sat themselves at her table.

"Have you heard the news?" Vicky asked cheerfully.

"News?" Taylor asked, ignoring the cheering coming from the cafe where several people were dancing jigs because they'd learned that the Nine were dead.

Amy glanced at the cheerful people she could see in the window and the news that was playing on the television over the counter. "I'm guessing that's a yes."

"Yeah, it's awesome," Taylor replied with a grin as she finished screwing in the last screw on her modified phone. She turned the phone on then pulled up the program that she'd created and slid the phone over to Amy. "Do you want to push the big red button?"

"The one that says do not push?" Amy asked, rather amused by Taylor's antics.

"Yep, just ignore the warning, it's not important, I wrote it," Taylor replied.

"Why are we ignoring it?" Vicky asked.

"Because it always feels better to ignore something when it gives you a warning," Taylor replied with a grin.

Amy tapped the button then grinned. "It does, so what did the button do?"

"Shouldn't you ask that before you push it?" Taylor teased.

"But then we wouldn't have plausible deniability," Vicky offered.

Taylor laughed. "Ah, I see you've played this game before. Button number one sent the remains of Ellisburg to an uninhabited world. Button number two, does the same thing for the Machine Army."

"Are you telling me that we just dealt with Nilbog?" Amy asked.

"And all of his minions, happy birthday," Taylor offered.

"It's not her birthday," Vicky argued.

Taylor shrugged. "It's in advance."

"I'll take it," Amy told her.

"You didn't happen to do something to the Nine did you?" Vicky asked suspiciously.

"What, like cut off their heads and turn them in for the bounty?" Taylor asked.

"Yeah… wait, what?" Vicky asked. "Why would you cut off their heads? That’s really creepy."

“B-but people were always talking about turning in their heads for the bounty,” Taylor complained.

“Yeah, but that’s just an expression,” Vicky said, “no one would actually do that.”

"Bonesaw had some nasty traps installed in everyone, I had to incinerate their bodies," Taylor said with a groan.

Vicky and Amy looked at each other and burst out laughing.

0o0o0

Danny walked into the living room and froze when he saw sheets covering most of the furniture in the livingroom. 'Is she planning on painting? I suppose I can free up some money for that,' he mused as he walked over and picked up the metal plate that was sitting on the coffee table. "Copyright Infringement Lass? What the hell?!" he sputtered as he sat down on his recliner and realized there wasn't any give. "Okay, did she put boards there…" he trailed off as he pulled the sheet back and saw stacks of cash like you'd see in a bank vault.

"What?" Danny asked as he pulled the sheets on the rest of the 'furniture', revealing an insane amount of money. "Huh, did she rob a bank…" he trailed off as he read the rest of the inscription, "Thank you for taking care of the Nine, Legend."

"I have so many questions," Danny muttered, wondering if his daughter would mind him borrowing a couple of hundred for the bar. He pulled his new cell phone out of his pocket and called Taylor.

"Hello," Taylor replied.

"I just got some good news today, do you mind if I borrow a couple of hundred to go to the bar?" Danny asked.

"I believe there's some money in the couch, feel free," Taylor replied with a grin, trying not to laugh.

"Don't wait up," Danny said, figuring he'd get the full explanation in the morning.

"Have fun," Taylor told him, glad that he had enhanced durability and resistance to poison.

Danny ended the call then grabbed a couple of hundreds and covered everything back up, figuring he'd deal with it in the morning.

0o0o0

"We have to go see Piggot now," Amy said with a grin.

"Why?" Taylor asked.

"Piggot once said that she'd accept healing as soon as Ellisburg was wiped off the map and I want to be the one to tell her," the healer said smugly.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Taylor asked, figuring she'd just create an illusion of armor so no one would know who she was.

"Yes, but first I need to figure out how to get a fake ID," Amy said.

"Why?" Taylor asked.

"Because I want to get Director Piggot a large bottle of Scotch," Amy replied.

Taylor used her Illusion magic to create an ID card and handed it to Amy.

"Amy McLovin?" Amy asked, staring at the driver's license.

"You do know that no one is actually allowed to card parahumans, right?” Taylor asked.

“What? Really?” Vicky asked. “Why did no one tell me this!?”

“Because it normally only comes up with masked parahumans, but the rule stands,” Taylor told her.

“To the liquor store!” Vicky declared.

“Do we have enough money for a big bottle of scotch?” Amy asked.

“Don’t worry, I have you covered,” Taylor said smugly.

0o0o0