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Welcome, 🌭s, to your day of appreciation. We’re awesome. We know that. We know it so hard we got Human Centipede’d and asked for the Ourobouros upgrade. But this isn’t about us. This is about you. Did you know you’re awesome? Because you are. We have proof!

First let’s check in on Sissyneck Corner, where the deputy mayor is a possum named Two-tongue Pete and he is drunk with power. We wouldn’t have pegged Sissyneck as a Misfits fan, but here he is asking the big questions about the girl with nipple-eyes from Verotika.

Hey, you know that moment when you drop a Hot Pocket on the dog but you just gave him a bath so it’s probably still clean enough to eat?

We finally have a term for it! That’s an Idaho Win!

Now on to the Comments, where FancyShark and Unwieldy Name reflect on WeStonePage, and the long defunct Unclean Boy Alarms:

Christopher Horne pins down the maximum number of Buseys that make for an erotic challenge instead of an imminent danger (175).

Somehow Matt got an actual interview with Bill Jemas, writer of Marville, and he went on the record to say:

Dean Costello guessed the film that got The Kavabrah through those lonely college nights, when all the girls said “no” and none of them passed out:

Joshua Graves made one mistake here: it’s not this week’s theme, it’s every week’s theme. Wait, shit, don’t end this sentence, we meant to say he made a grave mist-

Watch while Stephanie Reinheimer carefully and with malice aforethought builds a nightmare:

Next it’s time for Weekend Updape with Gellaho! Let’s introduce ourselves (no eye contact, butt elevated in submission) to the new apes Gellaho wrangled for us this month!

Business Ape is a consummate professional… until you look it in the eye, and then you find out that briefcase ain’t filled with project reports.

Neighbor Ape proves the apes have become self-aware, which was the plot of Planet of the Apes and most of the Fast and Furious franchise:

While Brockway fucked up guessing apes, again:

But Gellaho is a generous wrangler, and saved Brockway’s already fragile digestive tract from trying to break down “genuine” Taiwanese ape hair.

Now let’s move on to The Discord, where we may have spotted a flaw in this whole NFT thing: It’s… stupid!

Mo actually found the special place in hell reserved for Gleek. And hey! Isn’t this fun? It’s the same one reserved for Judas Iscariot and other betrayers!

Hey speaking of JCantrell, here’s the kinda heat he brought to get promoted to Big Dick J:

Man, which one of you assholes taught Javo film theory? He’s ruining everything.

The entire community is, of course, enamored with the idea of a Ken Shamrock anime:

It’s a bitter pill to learn that the Ken Shamrock anime does not exist. But they say you have to be the change you want to see in the world…

Anyway, while we put together this Kickstarter page, Javo also uncovered a great and terrible mystery that will haunt us until the end of our days. Which will surely come too soon thanks to an FBI bullet, or possibly a polonium float.

Greg opened the portal between Hot Dog and Heathcliff, despite all the extremely clear warnings against doing that by the many fortune tellers and creepy old gas station attendants camped conspicuously around said portal.

ProseAndKahn made this amazing video about the Amazon Echo: Hot Dog Bonus Pack (Miller Edition).

Ain’t nothing even gonna try to beat that, which is probably a disappointment to ProseAndKahn, who came to this wordfight with a videosword and was looking forward to lubing it up proper.

Congratulations, ProseAndKahn!

You take control over the Prince portrait, so long as you never try to exercise that right.

Our previous Winner, Mo, asked Prince-bot to get toilet paper down from a high shelf and, well, do you know what robots use as toilet paper? Here’s a hint: It’s Mo-shaped.

You folks are, as always, the best. And if anyone ever questions that, you call us. We’ll slap on our Harpoon helmets and have us a Hot Dog Harpoon Hootenanny.

(Don’t worry: It’s not an actual hootenanny -- that’s just what we call it when we kill somebody with harpoons.)

...

If these images are borked, you can read this article and every other one on the much better in every way 1900HOTDOG.COM.

Comments

Christopher Horne

Discovering “The Busey Threshold” remains my second greatest achievement. The first, of course, is being subject to Hotdog Appreciation. Y’all are the best.

SoylentRobot

hotdog heathcliff is very powerful

Matt Edwards

Getting an appearance in one of these roundups may well be the greatest achievement of my life.

Brendan McGinley

Those nunchuks are for Sean's protection. Brockway, as is his custom, showed up full of whiskey, and no man nor cat may strike him as he weaves down that sidewalk.

Alpha Scientist Javo

No seriously if someone knows why the root beer website goes to the FBI please let us know

Chris “Ace” Hendrix

When the apocalypse comes, 1900HotDog will be the best source for a stable, loving homoerotic biker cult.

Vooster

Congrats everyone! See you at Mo's funeral!

FancyShark

Great job, everybody! Jay, we miss you!

Talking Alpaca

I'm so glad the gorilla is still getting attention.

Joshua Graves

I don't even remember what I said that about.

Will Black

Fuck… I’m still working on “Blood Dolphin” starring Corey Haim and now I’ve got to make the Ken Shamrock anime. I truly do not want to do any of this, I simply HAVE to do it. The Hot Dog haunts me.

sissyneck

well my whole life i thought i would probably just be eating hot dogs on my own (or maybe with invisible jesus is there like that poem taught cuz with LaRene: the frankfurter does her stomach bad) but now here I feel there is a enrich sense of commmunity and support as I take a bite and pass it to you and so on or maybe were all just munchin our way to the center along the tentacels of a many dimensional hocdogtopus of shared humanity

Elgofo

Well from top of my head i will say the cdn redirection/preview stuff used by discord is « banned » by the rootbeer hoster and redirect to fbi (to prevent hotlinking for example) Then again i am in bed right now, but I’ll dig into that tomorrow, that seems odd AF