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You shrug, licking your lips. "Being a squire is hungry work."

"Couldn't fathom doing it myself, honestly." He bites on his own apple, and you both munch in silence. Then: "Great family outing, isn't it?"

You scoff, then choke. As you splutter and hack and wheeze, Gareth pats your back comfortingly. 

"Best not to talk about it, then," he says. "There's something else I wanted to tell you, though."

You wipe tears from the corner of your eyes. "Oh?"

He casts a wary glance back to the riverbank, then guides you farther away from the altar, into the thicket of trees.

"I talked with mother."