I am Emily… (Patreon)

"Mmmph..." Emily tried to exhale as Tom's lips pressed against hers, pulling her closer, as if he didn’t want this moment to end. As if he feared that if he let go, he would lose her forever.

She tried to focus, but everything felt incredibly strange and out of place. It was him kissing her, but after all, she was him… until yesterday. Something heavy tightened in her chest, and one question kept swirling in her mind: "What the hell is going on?"

When she woke up in this new body, the thought that it was just a dream or some cosmic joke held firm in her mind. How else could she explain that she—Tom—was now in a woman's body?

But Tom—the real Tom—had been by her side from the beginning, just as confused. Yet unlike her, he had accepted it much faster. From the start, Tom tried to explain everything as another universe paradox, but Emily, who had only recently been Tom, still couldn’t reconcile with this new body and this new role. Only yesterday, she had been living in his body, and now she stood before him, feeling her own femininity in every step—and it was driving her mad.

Still, she had thought that if this was all just a dream, she might as well play along, play the part. She decided to joke with herself, saying she was the female version of Tom from a parallel universe, choosing the first name that came to mind—Emily. It was all too strange to be real, and she kept waiting to wake up.

"Mmm..." Tom deepened the kiss, his fingers now stroking her back, clearly unwilling to let go, as if, for even a second, she would disappear. And he was almost right, because they both felt that this could end at any moment. Yet Emily didn’t want to accept that.

"Tom, I..." she tried to pull away, but couldn’t. 'I was you... just a day ago! I was a man! I was Tom!' her mind screamed, and now it seemed her game of pretending to be a parallel universe version of herself was no longer a game.

"Emily..." Tom whispered against her lips, and that name grated on her ears. She felt something tighten inside. 'Damn, this is a nightmare! Why did I sleep with him... with myself instead of trying to fix this problem?!' she thought, feeling a wave of panic and shame wash over her, flooding her mind. 'Now it feels like I didn’t just make up this name and… this story, like I… damn, I’m my female version! As if it’s true!'

Emily inhaled sharply, trying to pull herself together. Her thoughts were racing chaotically. 'Why, why am I so anxious right now? Is something about to happen?!' she managed to think, just as she suddenly felt everything around her start to blur, as if reality itself cracked. Her head spun, and Emily grabbed Tom’s shoulder to steady herself. The world around her seemed to vibrate, and the sounds became muffled, as if someone had turned down the volume.

"Tom..." her voice was so quiet, it was as if she herself wasn’t sure if she was still there. She looked up at him, and in that moment, she noticed his face beginning to distort. Not from fear or shock—it was literally losing its clarity, like a blurry photograph.

"Tom?!" Panic surged through her again, but her body no longer obeyed her. She wanted to move, to do something, but to her horror, she realized her arms and legs were going numb, as if they no longer belonged to her. Tom was turning into some sort of illusion, just like everything around them.

Emily desperately tried to focus, but everything around her seemed to melt, dissolving into something intangible. Tom’s face, his shape, even his touch—all of it was becoming blurred, as if reality itself was evaporating. Panic overwhelmed her, her head spinning, and her legs refused to move. It was as if the whole world, including her own body, was rejecting the laws it had once followed.

"TOM!" Her voice broke into a scream, which seemed to drown in the infinite, empty space between two worlds…

…

Finally, it ended, and Emily felt solid ground beneath her feet again. She collapsed to her knees, breathing heavily, her body trembling as if after a long run. Everything around her was the same—the same landscapes, air, weather. But… she was alone. And still a woman. A light breeze barely touched her hair, but it all felt distant, as if reality was near yet no longer belonged to her.

She slowly raised her hands, her fingers still sensing the cool stone she leaned on, but inside, a storm of realization was brewing. She was still a woman. All of this was real. There was no Tom beside her anymore, no game, no illusions or paradoxes. She was alone.

Emily rose to her feet, feeling her body tremble, her legs like jelly, but she forced herself to take a step. One thought pulsed in her mind: What now? She glanced around, as if expecting to see Tom’s familiar figure, to hear his comforting voice, but there was no one. Her shoulders slumped, and for a moment, she felt incredibly small in this vast, empty world.

With each passing second, the reality of her new situation became sharper. There was no going back. She could no longer be Tom, even if she wanted to. With every passing moment, she was becoming more and more Emily. Her female version?… 'Could it really be true?' came the voice in her head, her voice, the one that hadn’t existed in that other reality.

She had always dreamed of meeting her, always wanted to know what she would be like if she had been born a girl, but… to become her?! This was something else entirely. Emily had never imagined that her fantasies about what her life would be like if she were a woman could become this real. She would have loved to meet her, chat over a cup of coffee or… have sex! Like she did with Tom, thinking it was just a dream!

"I…" Emily’s voice trailed off, the words stuck in her throat. She didn’t want to say it, as if saying it would change something, but after taking a deep breath, she opened her mouth again. "I am Emily…" The words slipped from her lips, and something inside her stirred. It wasn’t a question, and there wasn’t a shred of doubt in her voice. She knew it was the truth, and now she would find out everything she had always wanted to ask the real Emily… Or was she, after all, the real Emily—the one she had often imagined, creating her life’s story while still being Tom?